ACE or PACE for Foster Care
If you could take an adverse experience and change it into a positive one would you? Would you think that that event defined you in some way and want to keep it? What if it literally made you stronger.
Do you think that you turned out "alright" because more good things happened to you than bad things? I remember telling my brother, "Thank goodness we're normal." I'd say this after someone did. or said, something I thought was rather foolish or downright stupid.
There is no normal. I know that. Our adverse childhood experiences define who we are. The ACE study seems to be gloomy and doom for anyone who has a bad childhood. It would seem that if we are the product of crappy parents, we are destined to be crappy parents in sick circumstances.
That is not true. Think of this. The abused child is fearful each night to go home because of an alcoholic father, a crazy (literally) mom, or arrive at filth and poverty without a parent even at home.
Foster care could be a POSITIVE experience. Foster care could be a time for you to teach resilience. Even if the foster care experience does give a point on the ACE scale, it doesn't mean the end of the world. We, as foster parents, can turn an adverse experience into a positive one that can be looked at with clear lenses.
Foster care can be a time for landing softly from adverse childhood experiences. If we are professional, compassionate foster parents who understand trauma, ACEs, and the child's potential destiny for bad or good, we can cultivate a relationship with them.